Making plans for the future is a normal part of any committed relationship. However, if you’re starting to feel like your partner is actively avoiding being nailed down, this could become a bigger issue later on. Even though the signs your partner is hiding their feelings about the future may be subtle, it’s important not to let their true intentions fly under the radar. During the early stages of casual dating, talking about the future of your relationship might feel like putting unnecessary pressure on the situation, but once you’ve decided to up the commitment level, talking about your future is something that can only be avoided for so long.
After all, when you’re excited to be together, discussing your plans should be something you both look forward to. Unfortunately, when someone isn’t sure about the future of a relationship, they may end up being evasive when you try to broach certain topics pertaining to your future together. If you suspect they may be unsure of their next move or contemplating a split , keep an eye out for the following red flags that may indicate they are not being as transparent about their future plans as they probably should be.
1. THEY’RE STALLING ON MAKING FUTURE PLANS
“If your partner suspects they’re not in it for the long haul, they’ll oftentimes stall on making future plans,” NYC-based relationship expert and love coach Susan Winter tells Elite Daily. “This form of stalling can envelope a variety of forms from being unclear about moving forward in the relationship to planning a vacation.”
Feeling like your relationship isn’t moving forward can be really frustrating. That’s why Winter recommends discussing your concerns with your partner ASAP.
2. THEY AVOID RELATIONSHIP CONVERSATIONS
The nature of being in a relationship involves talking about things that are happening in the relationship. If your partner doesn’t want to have these talks, it could be because they may not be as invested as they’ve led you to believe.
“If you never talk about it, there are no emotional repercussions,” warns Winter. “Avoiding relationship conversations allows your mate to bob and weave for the time being. This evasive tactic gives your partner time to carry on in the partnership without ruining the emotional environment.”
3. THEY DISCUSS FUTURE PLANS THAT DON’T INCLUDE YOU
Winter also notes that if you notice your partner is talking about future plans that don’t include you, this may be a sign that their priorities might not be in line with yours.
“Your partner may leak a bit of information that’s just small enough to go under the radar, but not insignificant enough to go unnoticed,” explains Winter. “This is a form of foreshadowing where your partner (consciously or unconsciously) reveals desires for their life that are clearly in conflict with yours.”
Talking about the future with a partner who is reluctant to do so might seem daunting, but if you’re hoping to find out where the relationship is headed, then it’s necessary. “Speak openly and honestly with your partner about your concerns,” recommends Winter. “Create an environment where it’s safe for your partner to share their feelings, even if what they say is something you don’t want to hear. It’s better to know the truth that you don’t want to hear than to be living a lie.” Once you’ve established what’s going on in their head, it’s up to you both to decide where you see the relationship going in the future.
Source: Elite Daily