It hurts so bad to love someone who refuses to commit in the ways that we know they should. Being tied down might not be ideal for everyone but when you’re already going through the relationship motions, that label can mean the world to you.
If you’ve ever loved someone who refused to really settle down and give you the proper time of day, you know all too well how harmful it can be to your emotional and mental health in a lot of ways. Below I am going to go over some of the signs that can and will help you work to figure out what the person you’re ‘with’ is trying to gain from your ‘relationship’ and whether actually defining things is ever going to be an option. If you’re an option and not a priority you need to cut your losses and move on.
8 Signs That Your ‘Lover’ Won’t Ever Actually Commit To You:
When someone is uninterested in defining things they will keep themselves distant from you emotionally. While you might try to open up and let them in they will do all they can to avoid it. They will not be the kinds of people who come to you and talk about their problems. Whenever something happens or is bothering them they will not allow you to be there for them unless they feel like using you in that instance is a good idea.
2. They are always trying to argue or pick a fight with you.
People who are not interested in committing tend to do their best to keep you thinking that things could or will end any moment. They are constantly looking for a reason to be mad at you and never giving you the benefit of the doubt. It’s like no matter what you do, you’re just not good enough. This is extremely toxic and you should not put up with it.,
3. They are constantly flaking on you.
People who are interested in being with you for the right reasons won’t flake on you all the time. They will make plans and keep those plans because they want to see you and experience things with you. Someone who doesn’t really care either way is going to want to cut you off when ‘something better’ comes along whether you’ve been waiting or not.
Someone who is not going to be willing to settle down with you isn’t going to want to spend much time getting to know you. He or she is going to come around to ‘get some’ and then head right out the door. Even when you beg them to stick around, they are quick to make you feel even less valid.
5. They refuse to really get to know you or let you get to know them.
When someone who isn’t ready to settle down comes into your life they may be a bit open at first but once they get you where they want you, they won’t let you in further. They don’t want you to get to know them and they don’t care to get to know you. They are getting the physical parts that they feel they deserve, nothing else matters.
6. Sometimes you don’t hear from them for days on end.
When they are ‘busy’ it lasts for days and makes you feel like you’re being given the silent treatment. It’s like no matter how hard you try to reach out they just don’t care to give you the time of day even for a simple reply. They only reach out when they want to get physical or spend some time with you and you need to realize that.
If they aren’t willing to settle down they’re most likely going to brush off your feelings when you try and talk about them. You might remind them time and time again about how broken it makes you feel to be their ‘plaything’ but they won’t ever make any changes. You as a person need to respect yourself enough to get out of the situation.
8. They will not even consider bringing you home to their parents.
These kinds of people don’t bring just anyone home. They don’t want you to get to know the people who matter to them because they don’t want you to or don’t feel you will be around long enough to make any kind of impact. This is a painful realization to make but one that you should not avoid.
Source: Awareness Act